Dear Mistress Lilyan,

This is an open letter and public declaration to Mistress Lilyan.

As you know, I'm currently battling within myself to resist buying a session with you this week. I was close to caving in earlier today when you were modeling your nude stockings in freechat. Luckily you went to a private session right when i was ready to crack. However, I assure you that was nothing but a momentary lapse of strength. My resolve is stronger than you realise.

I writing to inform you that I will not give in. I will continue to fight and resist your powers and not purchase a show from you this month. I'm sorry but this is something i must do for myself.

I can't afford to spend any more this month plus i really feel like this is all moving so fast... my head is swimming and i feel dizzy and overcome with lust when I see you. I was aware that I might have such feelings when i started this blog but i had no idea that the feelings would be so powerful and so dominant over my other basic senses... they have the potential to overtake any rational or common sense thoughts I have which is not something I anticipated at all. I can't have my urges to serve you feel more important than my basic primal needs. I won't let that happen.

So I'm afraid I'm going to have to refrain from any sessions with you during August. I'll continue to be in your freechat room as ordered and i'll also continue to follow your orders to not cum without your permission. Despite my fears and concerns right now, I remain a devoted slave to you. I still wish to serve you to my fullest potential. It will be my pleasure to continue to do so too... providing you are still willing to allow me to.

I hope this letter doesn't come across as disrespectful in any way, I'm only trying to stay within my limits and not get in too deep so soon. I set these limits at the beginning of the blog and I need to maintain those to avoid losing complete control. I really hope you understand and won't be angry with me. I'm sure you will continue to try and convince me otherwise but as I said before, my mind is made up that i will not see you this month. I really hope you understand. I promise to serve you in the way you deserve next month once I'm working again.


Forever your devoted slave,
David